A spot for my blog.

Thursday, March 24, 2005
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doinkz. after 7 long days, i finally found some time to blog decently. the last few short entries are to me, undecent updates. haa~.. =) so get ready for the long update ahead.

okie. where shall i start? as usual, shall backtrack to last thursday. last thursday, went to school in the morning for econometrics and science of music tutorial. a funny thing happened. it turned out that our tutorial room for econometrics was locked. every room there was open except ours. haa~.. the security was nowhere to be found so there was no way of opening that door. anyway, my tutor decided to have an open space tutorial. *faints*.. and so, he sat at the table, and the rest of us, some standing, some sitting went through part of the tutorial until the security finally came. and due to time constraint, no one was asked to do any questions. i was like so -gek- because i knew how to answer the questions for that tutorial! which means i would be called up next tutorial. doinkz~.. and if i cant do the question, it's like so embarrassing. =/ anyway, met up with weisee for lunch at westmall after school. then came home, stoned around, then met up with tooty for dinner because she insisted on it. so met up with her, shared with her some of my recent life stories. and i remembered being very troubled that night. was supposed to end my misery [read the previous 3 entries] that particular day/night. in the end, i did try and somehow i found out what i wanted to find out without asking. perhaps someday i should go and be a voice interpreter [hear the voice and know what is going on instantly].

anyway, i was upset. and this sadness was brought to the next day, friday. on friday, i went to work like some zombie because i was so upset that i didnt really manage to sleep the night before. was really -lostform- practically no mood to do anything but ah ger managed to cheer me up abit. haa~.. and of course, sek lin made me laugh abit too. i love working with sek lin because she made me laugh at the most un-laugh-able things. anyway, cris took mc that day due to her bleeding so there was severe lack of manpower. hence, was in tpy1 and tpy3. switching to and fro. doinkz~.. and i was really so bloody tired. helped brian with closing then went home.

the next day, met up with da ge for breakfast, sour plum came along too. doinkz~.. went off to tpy1 with jason. haa~.. it was really fun working with jason. he was funny and made me laugh all the while i was there. the only bad thing was, sales was like shit that day. haa~.. both of us were lazy at during certain periods of the day. but anyway, frankly speaking, i was amazed at the way he sell jeans. heh~.. i sucked at selling jeans. =) and poor jason, he didnt go for dinner break that day. doinkz~.. after closing, sour plum came over to pass me the keys and she just sat there to watch us do closing. doinkz~.. wonder what's her motive? maybe she like jason? haa~.. anyway, got pissed off reporting sales. and i actually forgot to fax the report to nick nack. already reached home when i realised that. haha~..

and sunday, i was back in tpy3 again. only sek lin and me because sour plum went for annual leave. early in the morning, jason panicked because he pulled out the nets paper from the machine and in the end, the whole machine got stuck. haa~.. went over to help. took a bloody long time to get the paper out. *wink* the two big guys not gentle enough with the machine. =) then went back to tpy3. super short of manpower again because darryn took mc. what the hell. doinkz~.. in the end, had to force sek lin to eat alone. haa~.. and she looked so disappointed. orh~.. sales was okie at first then it went tumbling again. *Faints*.. anyway, went to relieve tpy2 for break and there was this bloody kid that i felt like slapping. if i am his mother, i would have whacked him already. this bloody kid was spoilt to the max, and his parents simply dont care about his freaking attitude. so bloody rude. if i could, i would have given him two tight slaps on the face, and maybe chop off his mouth and tie him to a chair. *Argh*.. anyway, was so tired that night that i finished doing closing so quickly and nick nack gave me the disapproving look.

and yes, from the last entry, it can be seen that i reached home quite late on sunday and had to chiong the bloody essay. anyway, i finally finished that essay at 3am, which left me with 3 hours of sleep. woke up feeling like a zombie then chionged to philosophy tutorial. was so sleepy. then my tutor kept asking me questions, as if i am the only one in the class. *faints*.. there are obviously two huiminS but it seemed that all his attention was on me. -pengZ- had to come up with crap to answer the questions he posed. i wondered if it was me who never participate much in tutorial, somehow i think i am the one always participating in philosophy tutorial. anyway, my tutor laughed at my crap. =/ and everyone in the class was like so silent. doinkz~.. -scary- anyway, went home after the tutorial. slept for a while, bathed and came to school again. had macroeconomics lecture, philosophy lecture and science of music lecture. and every week, i went for these lectures and wondered why i was stoning away [except during macroeconomics lecture]. like now, i am totally lost in philosophy and science of music lecture. science of music not so bad because there is no exams for it. and philosophy, i really love philosophy but i dont understand what is going on now.

and on tuesday, had a short day in school as usual. heh~.. =) and i have to say it again. i dont know if it's my name or what.. i constantly got called up during tutorials to answer questions. for macroeconomics tutorial, i got called up every week. that tutor must have love me so much. anyway, he called me up, then i opened my mouth about to read out my answers, then he realised that i answered questions in class before, then he called another person. and this happens EVERY week. what the hell. but thank god, i am not having alot of problems during macroeconomics.

yesterday [wednesday], i went to school and bought 2 cheesy mushroom puffs from the coffee club express and went to class because i havent had breakfast. first, had the english test. it was like we always did in class. and anyway, i dont think i will do well for that since i am always not doing really well in the english class. then went for science of music lecture but i was stoning away again. then came back to arts faculty for econometrics lecture. forgot to print my notes but luckily i brought my textbook. heh~.. and i met a few peeps yesterday namely jac, rushan, tianxin and rong chen. and guess what, dorcas is so nice! i wanted to borrow her tutorial for econometrics, and she photo-copied for me because she need the tutorial at the last minute! =) and, nothing much. did my tutorials and readings last night, like every other night. i am so guai recently! =P

and erm, as for today, woke up at the unheavenly hours at 6am. chionged to school with my readings unfinished. and worst still, i got assigned into the 'race and ethnicity' group instead of the 'religion' for the tutorial. and that was the reading that i didnt finish! =/ anyway, was given half an hour, sort of group discussion or whatever but we didnt really discuss. and i chose to do the questions posed by the tutor instead of analysing the reading. haa~.. firstly, i had the texbook with me [thank god!] and next, i really hate the reading. anyway, there was only 2 questions and 3 persons including me did the questions. managed to sum up and crap abit when in fact the other 2 persons had sort of answered the questions. doinkz~.. i am really getting good at answering questions. after the tutorial, went for econometrics tutorial. and as expected, i got called up again. doinkz~.. anyway, the tutor got my name mixed up with another girl and he better give me my participation mark since i presented the answers to one of the questions today. =/ then came home. stoned. ate. slept. now updating. still abit more to go. =)

okie. now for the critical part of today's update - thoughts and feelings of the past week. firstly, i have decided to stick to economics as my major for the time being. reason for that is because i really cannot decide what else to major in and i believed that every module is as difficult. even for chinese, i believe there is no easy way out. and since i have chosen economics initially, i will persereve and stick to it. what i can do is maybe a shared major to relieve the stress of economics. but heh, doing a shared major may mean killing myself because i am faced with 2 subjects of difficult modules. and next, i have already drawn up a plan of what modules to take in the upcoming semesters. =) other than that, if everything goes well, [that is, timetable dont clash], i will proceed with special term. lala~..

next, i am feeling abit down today. today is not like any other thursdays when i finally heaved a sigh of relief after 4 days of lessons. i guess it's because i would look forward to work after 4 days in school. and fortunately/unfortunately [i cant decide which one], i am stopping work after this week. this means that i have 3 more days to end of work [yes, again]. so i am feeling slightly down because next week wont be the same again. i will have more free time next week but that will all be used to prepare for the upcoming exams. and seriously, without work, it's like something missing in my life. but i will get used to it, at least i have to, for a month. and after that, maybe i would, but most probably i wouldnt go back to hang ten. it all has to depend if i am able to find a better job.

then what else? i found myself very busy these days. and that is good because it kept me from thinking too much. i am so absorbed in work and school work these days. becoming so studious! haa~.. and of course, i still have a philosophy term paper due in less than 2 weeks, a music midi composition and an essay due in two weeks, science of music end of year open book mcq test in 2 weeks as well, and a few more tutorials for all my modules. now i am starting to panic because i havent start on my philosophy term paper. i dont want to use one day to think through and one day to tpye it out like last time. i want better grades! which reminds me, i still have other tutorials to do as well. really need to chiong.

then, for that something which had been bothering me [till to-date about 2 months], i had cast it aside for the time being. to speak the truth, i think i had been upset enough and now, i will not shed anymore tears for this matter. had been really super duper woper disappointed with this person who from mr goody had turned into mr monster. i really appreciated the presence of this person and touched by his actions. but now, i found that he is not even worth keeping as a friend for hurting me in this way. perhaps in the first place, i am not even his friend. even so, i hope that he is doing well now although i wont be there to see his successes and failures anymore, wont be there to share his sorrows and joys anymore. "wo jue ding xue jimmy yuan zou gao fei, bu zai gen ni you ren he de lian luo." and unless of course, if things change one day.. then.. like that lor. if things change, i will take things as they come. i miss the old him.

okie. finally said my piece. shall go and do some homework now. =)

"yin wei wo hen ai hen ai ni,
shuo yi neng wei xiao zhe li qu,
shui ran wo bu hui zai jian ni,
xin fu shi wo men ceng jing zai yi qi.."
- Wang Ling Rou, Dang Wo Men Tong Zai Yi Qi

"yin wei wo zhen de zai hu ni,
shuo yi neng wei xiao zhe li qu,
shui ran wo bu hui zai jian ni,
xin fu shi ni dui wo hao de hui yi.."
- my version

I blogged at.. 4:21 PM